It is not always easy to admit you can't be who you want to be. Spur of the moment becomes planned for moments ensuring all eventualities are covered and all possible consequences are considered. I can't be superwoman any more or even Icarus, which at the moment I would love to be. To have that freedom even if used stupidly and irresponsibly. I am just a very small person in this particular moment.
When I write I write moments and make connections between them. That is what I shall do with my life, I shall live moments and they will be all connected together through the love of my reduced life. I am sad about it today but tomorrow I will grab it and start living through those small moments. :-)