Dialogue

Happy Winter Solstice - the light is coming

In a previous post I spoke about the importance of showing not telling so a reader can experience the story. I also mentioned that one way of doing that is through dialogue. There is an art to dialogue though and these are some of my thoughts on it. Baggy dialogue that doesn't move the story forward and bogs it down could mean the reader may well just switch off. What you want to achieve is dialogue that shines and draws the reader into the story. It is worth considering speech as another form of action.

When writing dialogue don't write it the way we speak it in real life. That would be so boring!  It shouldn't waffle. What dialogue can do is reveal information that is important. *WARNING* Not in great chunks - the old adage less is more applies here* It can be done through narrative as well of course. Be careful how you do it of course. It mustn't be obvious to the reader that that is what you are doing though. There are times when you need to trust your reader to work things out. Remember also that information can be gleaned by what is not being said as much as by what is. Now there is a contradiction for you to think about. Don't underestimate the importance or impact of silence either.

You can use dialogue to set the tone and to allow readers to experience a scene. Also dialogue can be used to reveal information about characters and their relationship. Think about distinct voices for your characters, consider vocab, peer groups etc. Use conflict and tension (including fear and barriers) in their dialogue while remembering that all characters will have an agenda regardless of how small their part may be in your novel.

I am often asked about 'said'. It is recommended that it is your default attribution. It becomes invisible the reader doesn't see it but it gives them enough information without them having to work hard and allowing them to focus on the other words.  'Said' disappears yet gives direction. Use other words such as 'whispered' and 'asked' sparingly and with reason ensuring it does what you need it to. The same with adverbs attached to speech tags. Ask the question could I show this better? If not keep it in. Again less is more at times.

On a personal note I don't tend to put internal dialogue or thoughts in quotation marks or italics. Again I find it distracting. I have been writing a lot of dialogue from the end of the Second World War and I have had to make sure that contemporary phrases don't slip in. If they did it would mean the whole narrative would lose credibility for the reader I believe. It just wouldn't feel real. Something to bear in mind when writing historical fiction or even fiction that is set a few years ago. Think about what might or might not be said. Make sure you do your research.

Try and practice writing dialogue. Take a couple of your characters out of your novel and put them in situations and write dialogue for them just to see how they would react, what would they say. One thing to avoid when writing dialogue is the 'talking heads' scenario. Watch people having conversations. They never just talk. People are always doing things at the same time. You need to convey this too to make it feel real and to break up blocks of dialogue.  When you have written it read it out loud so you can hear it. Does it sound real? Dialogue should be short and sharp unless there is a good reason for a character to be verbose.

There we go some thoughts on dialogue. I hope they are useful. Today is the winter solstice. The shortest day. What a relief we are heading towards spring again and the light and sunshine. It has been a tough time for many reasons and I need to thank a lot of people who have supported people. They know who they are.

This song is for no other reasons than it has some very happy memories connected to it and because I am looking to the future now.

Make every word count

Writing is a long and sometimes lonely journey

When giving feedback this is something I often talk about.  Making every word count and ensuring that each word moves the story forward. It sounds easy doesn't it but it can be a little difficult and easy to forget when you get wrapped up in your story telling and the sound of your own voice. We all do it particularly in that first draft when we get excited about our subject. I personally killed three chapters out of my latest WIP. They were great but they did nothing for the story. They were fabulous if you wanted to know about horses though!

It is all about keeping the writing tight. Lots of unnecessary words end up slowing your story down and taking your reader away from the main point and main thrust, Impacting on the pace and therefore potentially losing the interest of the reader. How do you spot it? That can be the hard part. It is looking at sentences and paragraphs and asking yourself. What am I trying to say? Does it say what I want it to? Am I showing it the best way I can? And yes I am sorry often it comes back to that show not tell too (see previous post).

But and there is a big BUT it is not all about making the writing so tight there is no colour to it. When a reader reads your writing they need to feel your story. They need to experience it and become part of the narrative so they forget everything else that is going on around them and live it. You remember those stories that stay with you for days after you have finished reading them? That is what you are trying to create with your words when you are making every word count.

No one ever said writing was easy. Writing is a long and sometimes lonely journey.

I would suggest you can't do anything about making every word count until you have finished your whole story. I wouldn't try and do it while first writing the story because you might stop your creative process. Get the story down first. It is part of the editing process because until the story is finished you won't know which words are important! You won't know what is at the heart of the story you are trying to tell. Be patient and listen to your gut it is inevitably right. Go on have fun writing over the Christmas period.

I finished lecturing on Friday on what turned out to be a strange and difficult semester for me. Not one I ever want to repeat. I have never felt so disconnected and yes that favourite word discombobulated. My colleagues and friends have been brilliant and kind and generous with their support. They have touched my heart. My body has gone into melt down now as I have pushed it too hard. I really should know better. I have been disabled long enough to know what I can and can't do but apparently not. However it is the build up to Christmas which I love so much that has to make everything better.

Show don't tell

If there is one thing I am constantly being asked about it is 'show don't tell.' Showing is all about allowing the reader to experience and emotionally engage with the story rather than just telling them what happened. I should add there is always a place for a small amount of telling but the majority of times you can show it better. This is something I tell my students/writers - ask your manuscript 'can I show this better?' If you could do so. If not tell it.

Showing helps the reader believe in the story and live vicariously through your main character. They become part of the story. I am sure you can all remember stories where you've become so involved in the story it has become real to you. Well that is 'good showing.'

When you are telling you are instructing the readers what they are thinking and what they need to believe about the story. It is passive. Showing is all about personal interpretation. You are actually making the reader work, engaging with them and it is most effective if the reader identifies with your main character. When you are showing what you doing is leaving clues and hints on the page as to how the characters are feeling and what they are doing. It is then up to the reader to pull them all together to create the images you want them to. For example:

Telling:

Paul was angry.

Showing:

Paul slammed the door when he came in. His eyes were cold and hard as he stared at me. Pounding his fists on the table he shouted, 'What did you think you were doing?'

See you haven't actually mentioned he was angry once but hopefully the reader knows the fact without being told. As a reader you are involved in what is going on.

You can use action, dialogue, thoughts, description, body language and feelings when showing. Remember to use all your character's senses too don't just rely on sight and hearing. Importantly these all add up to scenes. Scenes need to move the story forward  all the time. Telling may occasionally be used to slow the pace down however. Don't info dump if you can avoid it that tends to stop the story dead. Weave those details in. Showing is all about convincing your reader that your world is real and believable. You have to ensure that your reader will also care about your main characters.

Dialogue must always serve a purpose too. It must move the plot forward or give more information about the character. Don't have a wasted conversation about nothing to fill space or use up words. Do not use dialogue for exposition either. If you do you are likely to lose your reader.

One thing to avoid are those wonderful 'ly' words - you definitely need to show that rather than telling the reader. Also work on the details. These are things that can make your work come to life. They can really lift the narrative. Don't just say it is a car but give a specific one because it immediately creates an image and that image also gives clues. For example and taking the car- the story is going to be very different one if your character is driving an old mini with one door that is missing than one that is driving a sleek red Ferrari - don't you think?

As a writer telling a scene is much easier than showing it and often in your first draft there will be loads of telling but don't worry you can go back and sort that out. It is hard work to show a story. Get the story down first and then work on it. We all do it.

I was asked once whether 'show not tell' even applied to children's books too - YES it most certainly does! Children love to become totally lost in their stories. They are passionate about their characters. Show them good stories.

This is just a very brief post on a what is a very large topic but I hope it gives you some answers and something to think about.

On a more personal note I went back to work this week after a long period off. I have a had a huge amount of support from some great friends. It has been wonderful. I have had some lovely emails, messages, cards and a some total surprises through the post - CDs, a hug in a scarf, a diary full of poetry,vouchers champagne and a fox. All totally unexpected and so delightful. I cannot thank you all enough. You helped me get through an incredibly difficult time.

I love this and it is for all my friends. 'I am just glad to be here and glad to have you by my side'

Reading again

I know three posts in quick succession after so few but I had to write this one following reading yet another article where an author boasted about how he never read children's book but loved writing them! Why would you say that? I really don't understand it. Don't get me wrong I don't ONLY read children's literature but I see no shame in it. I love the children's and young adult fiction I read and as I write young adult fiction I feel it is an important part of my life.

As I have said before I also read poetry to get the creative brain going - thank you to Tim Bowler for my latest find as he introduced me to the poet Gunnar Ekelof. I have a book I read in the bath. I have books I read for research and I have a book I read before I go to sleep to relax me. My life is all about reading. (Even more so when you take into the assignments and manuscripts I read) Sometimes I escape into books because I need to, because everything around me is going wrong and I need to get away.  It must be better to go to a book than a bottle surely?

I find it so sad that an author thinks it is appropriate to say things like this in an interview that is basically a bit of PR for his new book which is aimed at young adults. What message does it give those teenagers? 'Oh I might write for you but the stuff I do is not worthy of being read as I don't bother reading the stuff...' It is hard enough to them to read without giving them an excuse not to I would have thought.

I find it almost impossible to look aspiring writers in the face when they say to me that they don't read or they can't remember the last time they read a children's book or piece of young adult fiction when that is exactly what hey are writing. These sort of comments don't help that either. You cannot write if you don't read....well that's not true obviously you can write but you will probably be a better writer if you read. I thought I ought to add that caveat in there before someone hauls me up on a technicality.

I know I only wrote about reading in February I think but this irritated me so much I couldn't just ignore it. Please if you are a writer or an aspiring writer READ! You will be better for it.

And just because here's Lars Eriksson - The Lonely Journey Called Life

My Love Letter to Liverpool Libraries

Authors fight to save libraries

Authors Cathy Cassidy and Alan Gibbons have started a campaign to save Liverpool libraries. This is a campaign backed by many, many people including myself. This is just a small blog but I wanted to add my thoughts and my love letter to Liverpool libraries. I will email the link to Mayor Anderson as I beg him to change his mind.

First of all here is what Cathy has said: 'Eleven much-loved and well-used Liverpool libraries are about to be closed, and as the council are not listening to protests or petitions, a campaign to bombard Mayor Joe Anderson with love letters to the libraries has been launched. The letters will show how much the people of Liverpool - and beyond - care. Schools, colleges, teachers, families, businesses, individuals...we can all write letters to Mayor Anderson to ask him to change his mind.'

We have support for our campaign from over 500 authors, poets, actors, musicians, academics & creatives of all kinds including Poet Laureate Carol Ann Duffy, Children's Laureate Malorie Blackman and many other big names. Could YOU support us too by writing a 'Love Letter to Liverpool's Libraries'? Send your letter to Mayor Anderson at the Town Hall, High Street, Liverpool L2 3SW or email to: http://liverpool.gov.co.uk/contact-us/contact-the-mayor/

or 

http://cathycassidydreamcatcher/blogspot.co.uk/2014/10cathy-my-love-letter-to-liverpool.html '

Here is my letter:

Dear Mayor Anderson

Do you have children? Have you spent time reading to them? Last night I sat with my three year old grandson on my lap and read stories, one after the other. I lost count how many we got through. He lived every single one of them. He loves stories. He is lucky we are able to give him books but he also loves nothing better than a visit to the library as do his brothers and sister. 

In a recent article it was stated that 4 million children have no access to books in their homes. Can you imagine that? No chance to escape into different worlds. To explore and imagine. Those children may not own a book but they would have access to them if they can go to a library close by. If you close any libraries you are taking away those chances. You are taking away the opportunity for a child to let their imagination develop. 

I write young adult fiction. Young adult fiction allows teenagers to ask questions of the text and of the world they live in. It can help them to work out who they are and just as importantly who they are not. It is all about the vicarious experience as they think how they would react in any given situation. Once again by closing these libraries you are taking away opportunities for some teenagers to have access to books. To give them chances to read about others like them or maybe not like them but to help them understand how the world works. Why would you do that?

Liverpool has such a name for culture and for nurturing that culture. Being supportive of the underdog and believing that anyone can do anything. Libraries are the linchpin of all these beliefs. Why close them? Why take away these opportunities? These dreams? 

Please reconsider. 

We love libraries. 

We love Liverpool libraries. 

Regards

Dr Vanessa Harbour

Senior Lecturer - University of Winchester

Mentor - Golden Egg Academy

Writer - YAF

Seems only appropriate to use one of Liverpool's own as my musical message. We are all going to stand together

The book map - my nemesis but my writing would be lost without it.

A few sheets of my current book map

Writers have many tools to help them write and focus on their plot/story but at the Golden Egg Academy they use the book map. This is a tool that Imogen Cooper created and introduced me to several years ago. I have used it on two novels now and I love the map. Actually let me rephrase that there are times when I love it, there are also times when I hate it. There are moments when I am wrestling with the plot and trying to get all the various aspects of the novel to work together and into the map when it becomes my nemesis. It is when you see all those columns and think 'I can't do this' but you can and you do. It is always for the better.

It is a tool that allows you to spot that inevitable baggy middle bit - for example I have just ripped out two chapters in my own WIP. It was easy to do because you could see in the book map that they didn't actually move the story forward. Off they went into my 'darlings' document (yes  I have a kill your darlings one). Immediately the story is tighter.

My map is hugely detailed in that it has a column for the moon. I needed to know what the moon would look like each night through a cycle. You can't have a full moon when you only had one two days ago! Very important when the majority of the first half of your story takes place at night. I also have a column for my horses. I have so many of the animals that I needed to know who was dealing with what and where. This helped me keep track all the time. I could look at the map and double check. Everything is there you see. My character descriptions and yes that does include the horses. All my settings - fictional and real. It is all there.  Importantly my editor can see it too so that when she is looking at my novel she can check back to it as well. It makes communication easy.

I have worked with Imogen in the past on the Introduction to Book Mapping session that we run and inevitably there will be someone there who thinks this is really easy. I can almost guarantee that within a few weeks maybe a couple of months they will be saying, 'Actually it is really hard!' And it is. Doing a book map takes time, makes you ask questions of your manuscript so that you know it inside out. You really have to get to the heart of it and you will hate the process at times but I know from experience it is worth it so I put up with the pain now. I welcome it. Embrace the map, that's what I say.

If you want to see how others use the book map check out Sue Eves' blog

And especially for the Eggers in particular Andrew Wright who always says that the book map does this for him

Are you STILL writing that book?

It's a long and lonely journey

'Are you STILL writing that book?' are words that weigh heavy for any writer and cause much pain. They are often said by a well meaning non writer who has no concept of the process. No doubt that first draft was written rapidly to great delight but that is only the beginning.

A first draft is a shell of a story. It shows the basic form of it and gives you a chance to see whether the story does actually work. No doubt it will have a baggy middle and you may well have started in the wrong place. We all do but only by writing that first draft are we able to work these things out. What comes next is probably several rewrites. The rewrites may well go into double figures and that is not to be ashamed of as each one will be better than the last. I am currently on the sixth rewrite of my WIP. Rewriting is all part of the editing process. It gives you a chance to iron out all those parts where you can ask the question 'could I show this better?' It allows you to get to know your characters inside out. Work out your settings. I have in the past as I have mentioned on in this blog previously totally changed settings. Not this time though.

Writing is a long and lonely journey. This can be eased by working with the likes of the Golden Egg Academy  (GEA) where you have the chance to work with an experienced editor. You can be part of a critique group, where you develop a real trust for all the members and you can provide support for each other as you are in the same situation.

Don't give it to family and friends for feedback. However much you ask them to be truthful in their feedback they won't. They care about you and they are going to want to like it and not hurt you. Feedback is always a tricky thing. You don't always have to agree with it. It is there for you to ask questions of the manuscript. If several people are coming up with the same thing then there really is a problem but you have to remember all feedback is subjective.

Writing, rewriting, rewriting again however many times is necessary to get it right and editing all takes times and cannot be rushed. You cannot put a time limit on it. People often ask me 'How long until you think I will be finished?' I cannot give them an honest answer because I  don't know how long their personal writing journey will take. I don't know what their writing processes are but also you never know when life might get in the way. For example my own life has been turned upside down by a simple total knee replacement. I was supposed to be back at work last week. I am not and I still can't drive. It is quietly driving me potty particularly as the pain is very distracting and making it very difficult to concentrate. I couldn't have planned for that.

Those who do not write expect that you just write your novel, send it off and it is published. Oh how wrong could they be? As mentioned in my previous post please do not send your MS off to an agent or a publisher until it is as good as you can get it. There is a caveat to that though. There is a risk of spending too long tinkering for fear of sending it off. Sometimes you do have to bite the bullet and say enough is enough but only you (or if you have the support of the likes of GEA they will help you) can decide.

So next time that well meaning person asks 'Are you STILL writing that book?' reply 'Yes I am!' with pride not with embarrassment because you are doing the best job you can.

This seemed apt today