simple sentences that say everything

The esteemed DoS suggested I read this as a good example of a piece that uses multiple voices. He was right, it is. Maupin manages the flip between characters with ease as you just don't notice it. Each character as a very distinct voice so you immediately know who the paragraph is about. He hasn't written it so that each chapter has a single character rather within each chapter he can cover several characters by leaving slightly larger spaces between paragraphs to indicate change of character. This is likely to be because the book was originally a regular feature in a newspaper.

His natural way with multiple voices was not what I wanted to talk about in this blog. I was reading it last night and came across this simple sentence 'She didn't shave under her arms.' A sentence with only six words which implies a thousand. There was no need for any further description of this character and none was given. You knew what sort of woman he was describing. As a reader you knew when the story was set - 1976 and what was implied during this period when a woman didn't shave her underarms. A second wave feminist to the extreme probably. But no explanation was required. Those six words said it all. It is a confident author that is willing to leave at that. And something that I know I am guilty of - giving too much information too soon. I found a new acronym the other day - RUE - Resist the Urge to Explain and this will be my new mantra as I edit and re-write three of my chapters of THE novel.

I completed a story map yesterday so the whole story is now down on paper. It had been in my head for ages but it was very satisfying to see it in a tangible form. I will be interested to see how closely I stick to it or whether the story and characters end up taking me in another direction. Interesting times coming up methinks.

Chaosmos

This is a picture by Laura Matthews and is currently exhibiting at http://www.metrogallery.com.auk/ . I was introduced to her work through Facebook where her sister Nicky Matthews Browne (the author NM Browne) put the link up. One of the main advantages of Facebook. The picture is entitled 'Not Alone' and that is not something I can claim I have felt recently at times. It is a very weird time. I have been told grief can take many forms and last for up to a year but I seem to be just going through the motions of life. I assume I will get there eventually.

Anyway back to the PhD. I was supposed to be reading Bourdieu with regard to a research informed teaching project but the PhD jumped in again when a certain section sparked an idea which I am still working through.It occurred to me, when considering Bourdieu's second way that language 'makes the world' in terms of what language is 'made to mean'. It crossed my mind that as a writer of young adult fiction I am imposing and possibly appropriating the language/vernacular of teenagers and then feeding it back to them based on my interpretation, so I 'politicise' it. But then I thought am I actually appropriating it or when the teenagers take it back and read it themselves does the language go back to being theirs and their interpretation? I thought I was a mediator but perhaps actually I am irrelevant as the author. As you can see these are ramblings which I am currently working my way through. I am not claiming they are correct neither am I claiming they are wrong - yet! All thoughts welcome!

I have had a battle with bias as well. In that I was trying to make it far more complicated than it actually was and it was only when I went and read Jonathan Swift's Modest Proposal, that I realised I was right in the first place. I really must try to have a bit more faith in myself.

I have just completed a story map as suggested by the DoS. It does focus the mind and now have a very good idea how the story is going to develop, though I do acknowledge that no story map is final, it may well and most probably will change but it is a plan of sorts. I am hoping now to get on with some writing. I have to say that quietly because if my brain realises that is what I am aiming to do it promptly shuts down the inspiration department, so I have to sneak up on it, taking it by surprise. Wish me luck!

NCRCL Conference, Roehampton University

As predicted,yesterday was a much better day for me as I wallowed in academe. I went to the NCRCL conference at Roehampton University with my Director of Studies. I saw many people I had met at other conferences and who happen to be on the editorial board of the e-journal I edit with Andrew Melrose (also my Director of Studies) - Write4Children (found at http://www.write4children.org/). Peter Hunt was there, along with Maria Nikolajeva of the University of Cambridge, and Kim Reynolds, of the University of Newcastle. And had a Facebook blind date with Laura Atkins of Roehampton University, who has a brilliant article in our latest edition but also who I am in contact with via Facebook. Though dismissed by many it is proving to be a vital tool for maintaining contacts with other academics and authors for me.

Lisa Sainsbury's paper, 'But the Soldier's Remains Were Gone: thought experiments in British Children's Literature', was very useful for my PhD with her use of the though experiment, definitely something I felt I could apply to the books I review and the book I am writing for it. At the parallel session I attended, Farah Mendlesohn, who gave a paper entitled 'The Domestic Landscape of Children's Fantasy', partly solved a query I have about why there is that surprise chapter on Pan in Wind in the Willows when giving her paper, for which I am very grateful. Matthew Grenby from the University of Newcastle gave a wonderful paper on 'The Uses (and Abuses) of Literacy: attitudes to children's reading and the origins of modern children's literature'. This paper was fascinating as Matthew showed us examples of books that had been de-faced by children in the 18th century in much the same way children of today do. Writing their names in it, changing titles, colouring the pictures in, writing comments etc. And as my other passion is the long 18th century this was of particular interest to me but of no real use to my PhD.

The other paper in the parallel session I attended was one by Charlie Butler, entitled 'The Irrelevance of Genre to Historical Books for Children', which was an interesting paper as it broadened the definition of historical books to encompass time slip books and the like to the genre. Emer O'Sullivan gave a paper on 'The Cultural Construction and Literary Representation of National Characters in Children's Literature' which was a wonderfully amusing paper with some fascinating illustrations. Unfortunately due to my lack of stamina because of my condition we were unable to stay for Bart Moeyaert's presentation on the creative process, which was a shame though I imagine it was fascinating.

I had a chance to meet up with Alison Waller who has written a book I use so much in my PhD (Constructing Adolescence in Fantastic Realism). It was a joy to talk to her and I hope to have the opportunity again soon.

The day for me was both hard, yet enlightening, as it highlighted the freedom I now have. I didn't have to keep checking my phone nor did I need to get any of my sisters up to take care of my mother. It was a very relaxed day, if cold!

Another one of my baby steps to this new life and new identity I am now creating from the debris left over.

Thank you Laura and everyone at Roehampton for a great day.

just keep smiling...

...even when you are breaking on the inside. It has been a good and a bad day. Good feedback on the PhD but then I had to go and pick up the ring that belonged to my mother. She loved this ring.

People are wonderful they are concerned that you are ok. You just smile, you don't tell the truth, what's the point? They can't do anything. They can't mend you. Several years ago I lost my identity. I was a businesswoman, own business and all that goes with it, the power suits the lot. I laugh when I look back at it now and what I was like. Then I became ill and lost it all. at the time I pathetically wrote this:

I am no one

I was once

The briefcase, the suit that was me

Now, I'm the Tesco's carrier bag

It is crap I know but at the time it was explaining how I felt. I had lost this identity and had to find a new one which I did and is in the main exceedingly happy.

We all know that we are made up of several identities and I have recently lost another one. That of carer. I have so much time now, no pressure, I can do whatever I want to. I am going to a conference tomorrow. I haven't had to organise anything in order to go. I get up, get on the train and go. No worries about medicines, meals or potential falls.

Everyone is wonderful they have such fantastic ideas about how I am going to fill this time. I just keep smiling but on the inside I am in a thousand pieces as I try and find another new me.

Again.

It will be a good day tomorrow but today I just keep smiling...

Inappropriate timing

Today has been spent reading Bourdieu's The Field of Cultural Production as a continuation of this RIT article I am writing and wrote about in the previous post. It has been heavy going as it is a case of reading it over and over until I am confident that I understand what he is saying and what my take is on it - with particular reference to creative writing of course. That should be enough shouldn't it really? But what happens I am there concentrating hard on this and can feel an idea barging its way into my mind. It is like someone knocking on the door continuously until you answer it. I try and ignore it forcing myself to focus on doxas and 'space of possibles' but to no avail this idea is going to be heard.

What is this idea that believes it must be heard over my academic work? It is the end of a story I have been working on for 9-12 year olds, a piece of soft fantasy (don't google as I did and found myself being pointed to some sites that had nothing to do with children's stories). I hadn't even been thinking about that piece of work as am snowed under with other things like my PhD. I find it fascinating when things like this happen. There was no way this idea was going to leave until I had heard it out but it had come from no where because I wasn't even thinking about the story. why does it suddenly appear? Is that my sub or un-concsious working away for my benefit?

Whatever it is I love it. The ending it has suggested is just brilliant so I am one very Happ-Ness.

Even in Creative Writing...

I have spent this weekend researching for a piece I am doing on 'research informed teaching' [RIT] in creative writing. It has been an interesting experience as in the majority of texts promoting the benefits and importance of RIT any practice based degree is ignored. Certainly never being used as the basis for a case study. But then I have read a variety of articles on practice-led research which appear to take for granted the concept of RIT(or perhaps are just not aware that they are undertaking RIT activities).

When I was at a meeting the question was asked (as I think I may have said before) that even creative writing must have a methodology? I was surprised to hear this as I thought that the misconceptions about creative writing degrees had been buried. Apparently not. Those involved in 'traditional' subjects still seem to find it very difficult to assimilate research with creativity. The fact that both are intertwined and reliant upon the other seems to be ignored or impossible to understand. (see previous post mentioning Melrose's Creative criticality and critical creativity concept).

As part of this I have been thinking a lot about a model that Andrew Melrose and I have been developing. The need for it as it ties in ontological stances with epistemological stances and with methodology embedded in the centre. I realised that each creative project is not stand alone for an individual. Rather every creative project evolves out of previous projects, as such, there is no beginning or ending just a continuum. It was a very satisfying thought.

Words and music # 2

As some of you who follow my blog may know my mother died recently. Yesterday was her funeral and I was dreading it. However, it was a perfect day and one I enjoyed thoroughly (does that sound wrong?). It was fully of music and words - two things she loved. In my previous post I spoke about the power of these things. Once again there was an illustration of this incredible power yesterday. The words of an amazing priest, the voice of a great friend, words torn from the hearts of family and a hymn that brought happy memories to so many of us, all providing a panacea to the aching and heavy hearts in that chapel. Don't get me wrong it wasn't an event of wailing and weeping (though there was a bit of weeping), there was also a lot of laughter as our heavy hearts were very rapidly full of joy and love instead.

I walked out of that chapel feeling at peace and knowing she was safe and happy. I later received two emails both full of wonderful words from people who were not family but were there and who I care about. The emails were full of joy and happiness from the experience they had shared with me and my family. One of which was from the Priest who stayed with my mother whilst she started her journey. Her email told me of the love and beauty that was radiating from a coffin covered in flowers and that there were angels everywhere. Whether you believe or not (my mother believed avidly in angels as do I) those simple words reinforced the lightness of my heart and will stay with me forever.

Because that's what words and music can do. They can stay with you and bring back those moments of happiness and ecstasy in a 'heady scented moment of happiness'. (the quote is from the poem I wrote [with the help of the other email writer] and read at the funeral and maybe one day I will put the whole thing up).

I said goodbye yesterday and today, the 1st of May, is the first day I can move forward. My life is words punctuated with music and I will continue to use them to bring some of the happiness and solace to others as so many have done for me.